Untitled ficlet

[kerravonsen]

I wrote the following ficlet in the bus today. Inspired by one of the remixthedrabble drabbles, the idea wouldn't let me go, even though I'm not sure whether it works or not.

Title: (untitled)
Universe: Buffy (mostly)
Notes: Reference to a supporting character from a single Doctor Who adventure.
Words: 270

---

Cordelia had been a child when they left England, but she still remembered her father's gardens; his green cathedral where the rarest, most delicate flora were nurtured; the heavy, green smell of leaf and compost. Sometimes she wondered if that was why her mother had chosen dry, dusty southern California; to get away from the English green that evoked the suffocating verdure of her father's estate, or if it was simply that her mother felt that a divorce wasn't final enough to get out of his reach.

Yet California did not beckon until after Cordelia's father died. Odd things began to happen around little Cordy. Plants rustled when she drew near them; shivered in a non-existent breeze. They whispered secrets to her; of the deepness of root, the strength of branch, the potency of sunlight; how growth was competition; to win was to live.

At school, she learned to keep silent, for fear of being called a freak. When they moved to California, she was determined to be normal; the most aggressively normal that a rich girl could be. But always the top of the heap, always. The only way to grow was to cut down rivals, cut them at the root, cut them with words.

Even when her mother remarried, Cordelia kept her father's surname.

When she discovered the existence of vampires, it only confirmed what she already knew: normality was only a pretense, a thin veneer. The roots of the world were dark and full of blood. No matter how far you tried to run, it would catch you in the end; the way it had caught her father, Harrison Chase.

---

So, does the idea work? Is it too obscure? Too confusing? Too silly? And what should the title be?

Comments

[tptigger]

The Dr. Who reference is cruising right over my head. I kinda like the story though.

[kerravonsen]

Thanks!
I'll see if I can rework it to make it more stand-alone.

[drednort.livejournal.com]

I like it, and get it.

Title... a possibility 'Over-proud in sap and blood'. It's from Shakespeare's Richard II.

They are; and Bolingbroke
Hath seized the wasteful king. O, what pity is it
That he had not so trimm’d and dress’d his land
As we this garden! We at time of year
Do wound the bark, the skin of our fruit - trees,
Lest, being over-proud in sap and blood,
With too much riches it confound itself;
Had he done so to great and growing men,
They might have liv’d to bear, and he to taste
Their fruits of duty. Superfluous branches
We lop away, that bearing boughs may live;
Had he done so, himself had borne the crown,
Which waste of idle hours hath quite thrown down

It seems to me to fir Cordelia. Also ties into the English garden theme (the garderner comparing England to a garden).

Perhaps too pompous.

[kerravonsen]

Probably too pompous, but I do like the idea. Maybe I could shorten it to "Sap and Blood", which I think fits, though in a different way.

[watervole.livejournal.com]

I failed to get the reference until I looked it up.

[kerravonsen]

Ah well.

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

Mildly silly, but entertaining nonetheless. :)

[kerravonsen]

(grin) I thought you would get it.

[astrogirl2.livejournal.com]

I actually had to stop and remind myself that, oh, yeah, that is Cordelia's last name. But yes. :)

[sahiya.livejournal.com]

I don't get the reference . . . but that might be because I lack a thorough education in classic Who. I liked the rest of it though - it works as an interesting background story for Cordelia.

[kerravonsen]

Oh good, that gives me hope.

[izhilzha.livejournal.com]

I am unfamiliar with that Who adventure (except by having heard a reference to it once, somewhere), but I think this still works, as long as you know something about Who and are willing to roll with the ficlet. It's basically a Cordy character study, and as that I really like it. :)

[kerravonsen]

It's basically a Cordy character study, and as that I really like it.
Yay!
I'll ponder about reworking it to see if I can make it more of a stand-alone Buffy story (while still having the reference there for the in-depth Classic Who fans).

[jaxomsride.livejournal.com]

Good heavens, neat cross over idea.

As for title, um never good with those myself.
Something that plays on the phrase "apple doesn't fall far from the tree"?

[kerravonsen]

Good heavens, neat cross over idea.
8-) Thanks!