Fanfic writer rant

The origins of this rant is rather rambly... First, over at this post we have a bit of a discussion of some other unnamed person's assertion that most fanfic is written by teenagers. In the course of participating in this, I did a google search on "fan fiction", and came across, again, the article How To Write Marginally Readable Fan Fiction, and while I was reading the bit with examples of good similes, I recognised one of them. Could it actually have been something I myself wrote? So I did a search for that phrase, and found not only the story it came from (yes, it was one of mine), but also this mocking article which purpotedly parodies the original article, and does a fairly lame job of it, IMNSHO. The author of this, in his concluding remarks, says:

I look at it this way: People who write fanfiction are in it for a quick writing project that they can start, complete, and publish within a few days at the most. The fact that they're using an existing universe means they don't have to think of new characters or a setting, and don't need to bother introducing it because so many people are already familiar with it. Sure, there are people who take fanfiction writing seriously and put a good share of time and effort into it, but the vast majority isn't going to bother going through even half of the steps this guide listed. For instance, how many people do you honestly believe are going to bother getting a credited proofreader? Rather than write out a huge essay like this that will probably fall on deaf ears, it would have been a better idea to write a shorter, more succinct version that might have actually helped a few people improve their writing skills.

And that makes me want to rant. There are so many places where this person is just so wrong...
S/he assumes that:

1. Fanfiction is written in a few days at the most
   Oh yeah? The last one I finished took about a year to write. And that was NOT a case of, "oh I can't be bothered, I won't work on this for six months" either. The only things I finish in a few days are poems and drabbles.
   
2. The implication that using an existing universe and characters means there's no creativity involved.
   I am so sick and tired of this crap! I guess Shakespeare had no creativity. Neither did Thomas Malory. And Wagner's Ring Cycle had no creativity because it was a retelling of myth. Not to mention every Arthurian novel ever written. Oh, and every single historical novelist that ever lived has no creativity either.
   Repeat after me: Fan fiction is like historical fiction, except that the "history" is a fictional one.
   
3. That there are only a few fanfic writers who take fanfiction writing seriously.
   S/he must hang around fanfiction.net. Actually this person comes across as never having read a decent bit of fanfic ever. Never seen a posting of HLFIC-L or of TPFICT, never been to the Hermit Library, never been to Seventh Dimension, never seen Henneth-Annun, and never looked at the nominees in any of the various fanfic awards out there (such as the Stargate fanfic awards, the Cascade Times awards, the Halo awards, the Spooky awards and so on)
   
4. And that therefore it's a waste of time to write a long article with good advice in it because you need to divide it into tiny bite-sized pieces suitable for the normal dumb idiots that he assumes most fanfic writers are.
   Look, if you think that most of them aren't going to read it, then why not write it for the ones who are going to read it? It's called writing for your audience. The teenyboppers over at fanfiction.net aren't going to read it in a million years, so breaking it up into smaller articles isn't going to help. Besides, the thing is nicely indexed, people can come back and read different sections later if they want. Then again, considering that this person considers that the best way of helping people to improve is to mock them, I wouldn't really say that they had a good grasp on teaching methods.